Woke up in London this morning...
On some days I wake up in London (my adopted hometown) and I feel like I am now an adult. I have a job, I live with my boyfriend and I have finally lived in one place for more than 12 months (after nine years of moving around London every year). In less than four months I will have lived in London for (oh my god) ten years!!
I must be an adult..I have serious thoughts some times, I have clients (I am a lawyer ekhm!!), I discuss issues with my landlords and I cooked a family meal for my boyfriend's siblings on Sunday. Proper Greek roast lamb no less!!
I must be an adult..I have serious thoughts some times, I have clients (I am a lawyer ekhm!!), I discuss issues with my landlords and I cooked a family meal for my boyfriend's siblings on Sunday. Proper Greek roast lamb no less!!
Oh my god
BUT.. sometimes I am having a smoke and I am laughing with my friends a little bit drunk or am walking down the street with my boyfriend, or I say stuff like "oh my god" and "my boyfriend" once too often or I call my dad to get his advice on how to cook something and how to wash my favourite jeans and I realise that..hmm..am I really an adult??
Mummy
Mummy
I confess (being rather ashamed of myself) that I have always criticised my mum because sometimes she behaved (not her actions but the way she spoke or her mannerisms) like a child...and now I am thinking..was mum just normal all along? Did she go through the same thoughts I am going through now? It is a bit to deep to discuss with mum..but ..I think that in some ways I may be turning into her!! OH MY GOD!!
Back to London
I think living in London doesn't help the situation. Every-fkn-body in this city behaves like a kid..the girls buy clothes from H&M, the boys buy music from HMV, they all go out, have a drink and pretty soon they do not have a worry in the world. On Sunday evenings everybody moans about having to go to school erm work on Monday. Each and every one of my 27 year old friends in London.. are NOT thinking of having families but of their "careers"..or that's what they say in any case..and then suddenly they start dating a boy and spending time with his parents and not wanting to do anything other than just be with him...I actually have a friend who has a thirteen year old crush on a boy..how cool!
Briefcases
...and then there's the rest of us, in the long term relationship, started dating as kids and very scared of the day when we will wake up and oh my god we shan't be kids any more.. I think it will just happen one day..I will wake up with wrinkles, serious intentions of doing serious things and I will be the owner of a brief case (as a kid I always thought that people carrying around brief cases do serious and important things with their lives...).
Back to London
I think living in London doesn't help the situation. Every-fkn-body in this city behaves like a kid..the girls buy clothes from H&M, the boys buy music from HMV, they all go out, have a drink and pretty soon they do not have a worry in the world. On Sunday evenings everybody moans about having to go to school erm work on Monday. Each and every one of my 27 year old friends in London.. are NOT thinking of having families but of their "careers"..or that's what they say in any case..and then suddenly they start dating a boy and spending time with his parents and not wanting to do anything other than just be with him...I actually have a friend who has a thirteen year old crush on a boy..how cool!
Briefcases
...and then there's the rest of us, in the long term relationship, started dating as kids and very scared of the day when we will wake up and oh my god we shan't be kids any more.. I think it will just happen one day..I will wake up with wrinkles, serious intentions of doing serious things and I will be the owner of a brief case (as a kid I always thought that people carrying around brief cases do serious and important things with their lives...).
It's all a joke to me at the moment. I don't know what I want from life, from my career, from anything...all I want is to be happy, to read books to sit in the sun and to smoke..surely that's not what a person with a briefcase does!!
In any event, off I go to have dinner with the girls..another of my friends is leaving London to go home to Cyprus and presumably become an adult...I wonder whether she will be buying a briefcase as soon as she gets there..
